Texting Cowboy

I realize it's been a few weeks since I posted about my travels. I got busy and then had the misfortune of meeting Texting Cowboy.

Perhaps my first indication that Texting Cowboy and I were bound for disaster was when I expressly refused to follow the advice given by Unknown Man in Lobby (see here). In other words, I went looking for love. I did. I admit it. I even went looking in my own hometown, a rather novel idea for me actually. But look I did.

Texting Cowboy knew how to text, true, but he also knew how to woo. And woo he did. My favorite quote of this unfortunate whirlwind of a relationship (if you can call it that) came on the 3rd date (which also happened to be the 3rd day of knowing him- I know, I'm an idiot).

"Texting Cowboy, don't you think this is moving a little fast? I mean, you don't even know my last name yet."

"I don't need to know your last name. It's gonna be mine one day." [Spoken in a thick Texas accent.]

Here's where I would like to advise young ladies that though the above comment sounds hopelessly romantic, especially when spoken by a man wearing cowboy boots, if the above happens to you, Run!

A man should not be talking about marriage and your future "hooligans" on the 3rd day of knowing you, however exciting it may feel.  But run I did not. Instead, I saw him again the next day.

On Day Number 4, he proposed marriage. Well, he didn't mean it. I think? But maybe he did. I told him he would have to do better than that and I don't think he knew how. The only thing he had been taught to do was woo.

Despite the four heated days we shared together (heated in the most Mormon sense of the word - I do live the law of chastity), I never heard from him again. His voice anyway.

Like I said, Texting Cowboy knows how to text and he kept that up for awhile. But then I guess his thumbs got tired and I refused to be discarded when he felt appropriate. So as the Southern Gentleman he claims to be he found his way out when I made the mistake of texting the words "Oh hi." Now, there are several different ways that "oh hi" can be interpreted. My sister and I say "oh hi" to each other often when we get a happy but unexpected call. But apparently, "oh hi" was on his list of things you should never text a man. (Maybe things would have turned out differently if I had only put an exclamation point!) So with that, his character, or lack thereof, was revealed. He pulled out as the coward and womanizer he showed himself to be.

Unknown Man in Lobby proved to be right again! I never knew such wisdom could be found while waiting idly in a Houston hearing office. I must listen more carefully next time I find myself there.

I will now redouble my efforts to Not Look for Love, despite the enticing idea I was given by a friend yesterday to advertise: Attorney with Shotgun seeks Wilderness Guide. Let's face it, hunting season is drawing to a close and I've still never been! But no...I must be strong...Not..Looking....