Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Reconciling Faith, Gender & Career

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I was raised by a college-educated mother who chose to stay home and raise her five children full-time. I was blessed immensely by my mother's decision and appreciated her sacrifice and availability. Her job was not easy. Amidst raising five children, my mother decided to return to school and earn a Master's degree in education. I remember this well as I was in junior high school at the time and required to help out by cooking one meal a week for the family when my mom was at class (or at least that's how I remember it). Perhaps this is the only time in my life that I cooked on a regular basis.

Despite earning her advanced degree, my mother had no immediate plans to return to the workforce. That return would not come for another ten years when her youngest was on his way out of elementary school. Even though my mother did not work when I was in her home, she taught all of her children by example the power of education. All of her children have gone on to receive advanced degrees, except for the youngest and only because he's still too young.

As a school teacher, I never really felt the need for a career plan (although maybe I should have had one?). But as an attorney learning to lean, I find it imperative. This is new territory for me and there's even a small sense of guilt as I contemplate my future. I had always hoped that by now I would be whisked away in eternal marriage bliss and stay home and make babies. Even though this is not the case, I still feel like I need to consider this option as I move forward in my career. I'm beginning to realize a lot of women do this as well. We plan for something we hope will come even though it may not be for ten more years down the road. I'm not saying that we shouldn't hope to have a marriage and a family one day (I do!) but I'm wondering if the hope for it holds us back sometimes and prevents us from accomplishing great things in the meantime.

I believe that "there is no superior career, and no amount of money, authority, or public acclaim [that] can exceed the ultimate rewards of family."* I, therefore, believe that being a full-time mom is a highly noble calling. I applaud my mother, sisters, and friends for accepting this calling even though it is not always easy. I hope to join them one day.

Despite knowing this, I am beginning to see that some women may be called to work. Even if they can afford to stay at home and even if it it's not their first choice. I was conveying this idea of being called to work to another young, single, female attorney of faith last weekend. I felt almost blasphemous expressing these thoughts, like I was betraying principles I've embraced, believed and taught.

One joy of being a woman is that we have a myriad of paths to choose from. Many of us will jump back and forth between these paths several times through out our lifetime. There is no rigid course we must follow. The key to determining which path is best at which time for us individually is personal revelation. My path may not be the same as yours and that's okay as long as it is the path I am supposed to be on.

With these ideas of some women being called to work and the importance of personal revelation swirling around my head, I found a wonderful example in Noelle Pikus Pace, the 2014 Olympic silver medalist in the women's skeleton.

According to her Mormon.org profile, she retired from the sport after 2010 because she wanted to focus on her family. But in 2012, she and her husband felt she needed to return to the sport one more time. After fasting and praying their decision was confirmed. Now she is an Olympic silver medalist. Though her career as a working mom was brief, it was fueled by inspiration, and she now has the stage and credentials to be a powerful force for good.

Though we may not all be Olympic athletes and our spheres of influence are often much smaller, I believe that women of faith have much to contribute not only to our homes but our communities and professions.

"The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.”**

Though following a career path may at times seem in juxtaposition with the above quote, I believe women of faith can and should permeate their influence in the workforce as well.

So if your current path is calling you to reach out, step up, and lean in whether that be at home, school or work - dare I say - Do it! We need women of faith leading, guiding, inspiring, and contributing wherever they may be. Don't limit yourself by the unknown around the corner. And if you are called to work for a time or a lifetime, excel at what you do by remembering who you are and what good you can accomplish.




*Elder D. Todd Christofferson: The Moral Force of Women

**Margaret D. Nadauld: The Joy of Womanhood





6 comments:

Alan said...

Well said! You are a more powerful influence than you probably realize!

OTR said...

Thanks Alan!

Sarah said...

I fully agree that some women are "called to work." My sister's patriarchal blessings says something of that effect. That she will need to work. We have often wondered if she will need to work because her future family will need the income or if it is to help her with changes of scenery--home to work (she is a goer and a doer) or because there is someone out there in her field of work that she will influence.

Great post. Love your perspective.

OTR said...

Thanks for your comment Sarah! I appreciate you sharing about your sister. Glad I'm not alone. :)

Slim said...

This was such a great post! Thank you so much for sharing and being so authentic. You bring up excellent points. Thank you for doing so much good for this world! I love you!

OTR said...

Slim, you are certainly welcome. Love you too!

 
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